
About to get over with my studies in about a year, am surrounded by my parent's anxieties to find me a 'suitable boy'. With people my age already declaring 'kabool hai', 'trying the knot' or 'walking down the aisle'. I am forced to believe that my days of singlehood are numbered. Marriages in India are said to be coming together of not just two individuals but two families. Even Rakhi Sawant has been repeatedly emphasizing in her 'swayamvar' that she wants to marry the entire family of the groom, I wonder whether she will take 'pheras' with all of them?
The process of marriage starts with groom hunting if you are unable to find one on your own. Your parents try not only to find you the eligible match but also work on making you eligible for the match. With that begins the process of shedding the excess weight from your body, being fair and lovely, learning to behave in a more feminine and coy fashion to learning how to cook and getting more interest in domestic chores. The boys on the other hand have to just come up with a list of demands about the kind of girl they want as long as they have a respectable, good salaried job.
After the match-making the preparations for marriage begin which includes endless shopping and important decisions to be made on the caterer, decorators and beautician. Hence, the girl's parents go wreck trying to do much more than they could afford. The respectable and educated families say no to dowry, but usual things like furniture, expansive clothes and jewelry and if possible a flat and car are expected. Even the girl's family has to make a show of how much can they give to their beloved daughter in front of their relatives and the groom's family. Elaborate dressed which the girl will never again wear and loud jewelry to be nicely kept away in bank lockers is given. If these are gifts for the girls, why aren't some gifts given to the boy too? After all it's his marriage too….poor soul might feel so left out. Also will the girl's parents never again see her that all these wonderful gifts have to be given in one go? They boy's family proudly declares that they did not ask for these but can they also say that they deny to accept these?
However, the façade has just begun; the real winner is the wedding day itself. Innumerable people are invited, people the bride or groom don't know and will never know, come, eat and make merry. Food from different parts of India and the world is served. The bride is decked up in heavy make-up, dress and jewelry. To give her the perfect look she goes though long sessions from at least a month back at the beauticians. To top it all, marriages have to be picture perfect, so the camera man can even make you redo the whole ceremony because he didn't get the right shot.
Finally alls done and everyone returns home apparently happy and definitely tired. From here the reality of life begins, as the bride and groom start with their married life. The whole façade leading to a reality which changes lives forever.
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